Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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