Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
