You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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