I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
