i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
