I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
