Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
