Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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