watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm just crazy horny about you
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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