So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
