do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
