but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
operation have a gay friend backfired
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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