ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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