...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
