my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Randomize
