we're chasing vodka with high fives
I looked at my own cervix.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
