I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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