We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize
