ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
