Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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