Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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