VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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