My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
