spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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