Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Randomize
