Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
