I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Randomize
