dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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