im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Pooping to opera.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
