honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
