I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
