I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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