i permit you to call me
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
