Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
