This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
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