I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
