Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize