dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
