I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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