On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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