I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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