just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize