The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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