I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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