So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
