So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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