Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize