Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
