so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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