Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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